Parenting: Level Up

NEPEM Model

Over the last seven weeks, I've been enrolled in a parenting class through BYUI (FAML120). I've learned so many great things from this course, I wanted to record what I've learned, to revisit as needed. 

The class is based on the NEPEM Model, NEPEM stands for "The National Extension Parent Education Model" The model has seven categories that provide the framework for improving the parenting experience. 

1. Care for Self
2. Understand
3. Guide
4. Nurture
5. Motivate
6. Develop
7. Advocate

Each week we studied one of the framework items and discovered why each category is helpful for a parent-child relationship. 

NEPEM artwork source

Care for Self

One of the first activities we completed was a "Care for Self, Personal & Relationship Journey" check-in. We answered a series of questions intended to help us evaluate our relationship with ourselves. This was a helpful exercise to notice where I naturally excelled, and what areas I could take time to improve upon. Maybe you're like me, and have a hard time asking for help? Perhaps you're struggling finding meaningful relationships with other adults (parents, spouse, friends, etc.)? Whatever it may be, I encourage you to prioritize yourself, and your needs! 

In class, they referenced Marion G. Romney saying, ""Without self-reliance, one cannot exercise these innate desires to serve. How can we give if there is nothing there? Food for the hungry cannot come from empty shelves. Money to assist the needy cannot come from an empty purse. Support and understanding cannot come from the emotionally starved. Teaching cannot come from the unlearned. And most important of all, spiritual guidance cannot come from the spiritually weak." ("The Celestial Nature of Self-Reliance", October 1982 General Conference)

Parenting Styles

We also reviewed different types of parenting styles, Authoritarian,  Authoritative, & Permissive parenting. Authoritarian parenting styles are rigid and unbending, often disregarding children's feelings. On the opposite end, permissive parenting does not provide any boundaries and consequences for the child. Authoritative parenting is a healthy balance of boundaries and expectations for the child, with plenty of flexibility to navigate nuanced situations. I think the ideal parenting style is authoritative, and I am trying to model my behavior within those guidelines. You can take a look at these, and other parenting styles here: Comparing Types of Parenting. 

Over the next three posts, I'll share my favorite takeaways from this semester. 

xo, Tonya

Works Cited:

Christiano, D. (2019, September 27). Comparing types of parenting: Authoritative, permissive, more. Healthline. Retrieved April 5, 2022, from https://www.healthline.com/health/parenting/types-of-parenting

Romney, M. G. (n.d.). The celestial nature of self-reliance. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Retrieved April 5, 2022, from https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/1982/10/the-celestial-nature-of-self-reliance?lang=eng

Steinberg, L. D. (2005). The ten basic principles of good parenting. Simon & Schuster Paperbacks.

Summary of the CYFAR core competencies. (n.d.). Retrieved April 5, 2022, from https://cyfar.org/sites/default/files/cyfar_research_docs/Summary.pdf